How happy now is

August's full moon fades
while summer shimmers silver;
How happy now is!

Why Insecure

Why insecure we humans?

But first, what is our reaction when insecure?

That's the key to the Why question.

Be brave.

I'm grateful for slowing down

From this month's Gratefulness.org newsletter:
"If gratefulness did nothing more than to slow us down, it would still be one of the most powerful tools for transformation that the world has ever known."

I am grateful for slowing down and walking home from work today. I encountered three different friends, two that I rarely see, chatted with each, and am happier tonight because of doing so. I'm also grateful for stopping in at The Gypsy. I saw Catherine who just got home from Sweden and is back in class at law school already, and met Travis, a new barista; we exchanged stories about urban living, going to CSU and knowing Norm Krumholz. Thank you to all.

Relating to Rain

How do we relate to rain?
- Call it The Rain
- Stormwater run-off, flooding
- "We needed that rain"
- Drive slower, ride bikes faster
- Grumble and grouse
- Hate the grey skies
- Love the sound of it
- "Not on Monday morning!"

How does rain relate to us? It rains. Then it doesn't.

How could we relate to rain? Raining. Thank U.

Emerson on blogging

Instructions from Emerson on blogging:

"The way to speak and write what shall not go out of fashion is to speak and write sincerely. The argument which has not power to reach my own practice, I may well doubt, will fail to reach yours. But take Sidney's maxim: "Look in they heart and write." He that writes to himself writes to an eternal public. That statement only is fit to be made public which you have come at in attempting to satisfy your own curiosity. The writer who takes his subject from his ear and not from his heart would know that he has lost as much as he seems to have gained, and when the empty book has gathered all in its praise, and half the people say - "what poetry, what genius!" it still needs fuel to make fire"

- Essay IV, Spiritual Laws

Metaphor as practice

At the Zendog this morning we talked about how metaphors in Zen are always pointing to practice.

The metaphor: The pond becomes clear with the muck is left to settle.

The practice: Our minds become clear with zazen. When we sit we let go of all the muck. Everything we think important enough to cling to, creating suffering, we learn to let go of. Creating a clear mind of awareness.

Each Moment Passes

Each moment passes,
some sweaty sticky, some on August's breeze;
all were never now.

Riding as fast as I am riding.

Riding my bike on Saturday I practiced my koan.

I was grateful for going as fast as I was going. For being able to ride - healthy enough, strong enough.

I then became grateful for not going any faster and for not going any slower. The former was more difficult than the later as I almost always want to be riding faster.

The practice allowed me to shift into awareness of the present and to be happy with it, with riding just as fast as I was riding. It was a moment of true presence, unencumbered with expectations, lacking grasping for things to be other than they were. Nirvana on two wheels. Really.

Gratefulness Koan

Here's a practice I am taking up:
Be grateful for the way things are and be grateful for the way things are not.

It came to me during Friday morning meditation at the Zendog yesterday. Jan and I talked about it during dharma discussion. It is staying with me like a koan does I suppose. I'm not sure what it means or what it will result in but I've heard that's the way of a koan; not rational, breaking through the rational construct we create, opening to the way things are. Also, it's all about the present. All about the present. All about the present.

So, what can I say about this practice so far?

• I am grateful for the memory of my parents. Am I grateful that my parents are now dead? No. I will practice to be so.
• I am grateful that I do sitting meditation three or four times a week. I am grateful that I don't sit every day.
• I am grateful for my job. I am grateful that I don't look forward to going to work every morning.
• I am grateful for my overall health. I am grateful for my neuropathy.

All in the present? Smack no. I am grateful to accept and not judge things the way they are right now.

Emerson's Directions

"Place yourself in the middle of the stream of power and wisdom which flows into you as life, place yourself in the full center of that flood, then you are without effort impelled to truth, to right, and a perfect contentment. Then you put all gainsayers in the wrong. Then you are the world, the measure of right, of truth, of beauty."

"Each man has his own vocation. The talent is in the call. There is one direction in which all space is open to him. He has faculties silently inviting him thither to endless exertion. He is like a ship in a river; he runs against obstructions on every side but one; on that side, all obstruction is taken away, and he sweeps serenely over God's depths into an infinite sea."



Essay IV: Spiritual Laws

Forgivness of Self

During our dharma discussion at the Zendog yesterday we talked about forgiveness. Listen:

Was forgiveness part of the Buddha's teaching? Maybe not.

Can one really forgive another? Is not the act based upon an illusion and grasping? The illusion being that we know what even took place. Were we so present to the offending act to have no doubt as to intention, emotion and thinking? No. If we were then we'd know there was no offense, just hurdles to that person's full expression of love. We grasp the illusion to avoid the pain.

What about forgiving ourselves? There's some bean on that vine. We can wipe clean our hearts by forgiving ourselves. We can open our hearts by forgiving ourselves. In opening we can then witness what seeps out, what arises. Pain, regret, shame, lost love, lost time, loss. Witness and let go. Because we witness only in the present perhaps we may not be deluded. Let us hope so.

Thank you dharma brothers and sister. Welcome Holly.

Blame

I overhead this conversation between the jay and the bat early this morning:

What does blame do? Makes victim and oppressor.

What does blame hide? The pain of both.

How is blame dissolved? Forgiveness of self and the other; love of self and the other; gratefulness.

Katie's birthday

Today is my daughter's nineteenth birthday. Katie is an amazing young woman and I am incredibly proud to be her father. I am grateful for every moment.

There is nothing I know like becoming a parent and then having to let go. Like much of life the secret to being happy is to keep loving after letting go.

I love you Katie.

Crickets return

The crickets return
In full ochestra with July's heat;
We lay in the yard.

What's happened to The Renaissance Man?

When young I often envisioned myself leading the life of a Renaissance Man. One who among other things:

• Read often, not just what I enjoyed but also what would expand my knowledge and lead to wisdom.
• Had knowledge of science, art, politics and ethics.
• Considered myself as never knowing enough.
• Considered myself as having only one point of view among many.
• Included the physical arts among the arts.
• Knew more than one language.

Flash forward, what's happened? Well, this ideal is now titled The Integral Person and has a low value in Amerika, outside of academia where more illusion due to belief in specialization exists than wisdom. And being a responsible adult I now have goals in these categories. LOL.

My wisdom to date? I believe that two most important qualities of the Integral Person are to laugh at oneself and to love others. This opens the door through which all practices lead to wisdom.

What's the biggest obstacle to becoming Integral Persons? For middle-class Amerikans it is our jobs. Whether due to greed or to pride or misplaced commitments we give too much time and energy to our work; leaving too little time and energy for other practices. STOP IT so you can begin other practices. Just pick one, or a new one, steal the time and energy from your job and start practicing.

Let me offer two resources for aspiring Integral Persons:
1. Ken Wilbur's Integral Naked site at www.integralnaked.org
2. Jack Ricchiuto's new book, Conscious Becoming available at www.DesigningLife.com

And one inspiration. I have a friend in his mid-fifties who in the past five years has learned a new language, fallen in love with the Earth, begun creating his life in a sustainable way, learned photography, bought a new bike, started an on-line column, entered a new love relationship, and created a sustainable living affinity group with the coolest name created in Cleveland this year (way cooler than Cleveland+) among similar practices. If you know him you are inspired to expand your practices.