Fascinated by sadness

I am both captured by and fascinated with sadness of late. I can't escape it and instead of moping around in it, as had been my habit, I've been expressing it. In the expression there is unveiled a depth to the sadness inside of which I often appreciate what I find - not only real reasons for being sad but also other emotions mixed in, mostly appreciative ones: affection, longing, even joy.

An obsolete use of the word fascinated is "bewitched" - for me the being caught in moping. The current use can included "enthralled." Isn't it interesting for one to be enthralled by sadness. I love these seemingly contradictory meanings. They are great for haiku. They are true for life.